Happy New Year and Humor too!
~*~
Happy New Year 2010!
Got on the scale today to see where my starting number is and remembered reading a blog about Jane Mansfield. She had 5 children before her early death and well... this pic says it all! She knew how to keep her body in shape!
~*~ And now for a little humor ~*~
'Twas the week after Christmas, and all through the house,
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste,
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).
I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared,
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared.
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese,
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt,
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt.
I said to myself, as I only can,
"You can't spend a winter disguised as a man!"
So--away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished,
'Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie--not even a lick,
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot,
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste,
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).
I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared,
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared.
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese,
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt,
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt.
I said to myself, as I only can,
"You can't spend a winter disguised as a man!"
So--away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished,
'Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie--not even a lick,
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot,
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!
~*~
Posts
17 Cha Cha Bloggers left a comment:
Great post....Oh and so true, for today I felt exactly like every line you wrote. I wish you happiness and peace and may your celery and carrots sticks be tasty in the new year. Hugs, Mumzie :)
hee! I refuse to get on the scale for one week. Maybe I'll loose what I gained and I'll never even have to know how much it was! :)
I look just like that but without the baby.
I didn't know Jayne Mansfield had 5 children!? Good for her. I wish large families would make a come back.
My waistline is slowly disappearing every year. [sigh] I used to be so athletic. Oh well. I give up. :)
Yep, she has a famous actress daughter too... Mariska Hargitay.
I've never read that before. How funny!
As serious as this poem was "meant" to be....I have to say I chuckled through the whole thing----been there, done that!
I suppose I must agree with you on the "banishing" of the goodies, but personally, I will probably still sneak in a few desserts here and there. I figure if I spread them out then it doesn't count right? lol
Cute post. Thoroughly enjoyed it :)
That is a cute poem. I've had three children and sadly have a shape that doesn't look anything like Jayne's. I am cutting out the treats and trying to get back on track and it's nice to do it with a little humor.
This is certainly a MOST fitting piece for the first Monday of the new year! (And I have always loved Jayne Mansfield. Probably one of the reasons I'm such a fan of her daughter Mariska Hargitay!)
hahaha! Hilarious, Janeen! There's nothing like a sense of humor to deal with the expanding waistline! And with life!
Here's to the best everything, Janeen! Love, Petra xo
It's always best to put the scale up in the attic until March. Mine's up there to stay. Enjoyed the poem and the shapely picture.
Ha! Ha!
My solution for the New Year is soup.
Honest, it is.
I'm posting about it tomorrow.
Jane Mansfield did a public appearance in Walnut Creek years ago just before she died. She autographed a picture for my Dad, "to Jimmy from Jane Mansfield" that I still have!
Now I'm off to eat my doughnuts..........so much for dieting!
I weighed this morning...I haven't gained...I haven't lost. I'm still fat! What is it about the over indulgence of the holidays that makes everyone want to clean, diet, exercise and generally trim everything in their life down. I've been wanting to clean out my closets.
Thanks, Janeen...I laughed so hard through this post, as I remember at least twice over the holidays when only briefly, thinking, " Rebecca, you really shouldn't eat another cookie.." LOL!!
Happy Friday!
What a great post and poem! Oh if only I could have a body like that!!!! I have to confess that I ate too many chocolate covered pretzels and candied nuts (thanks to Miss Jean) and have a bit of a muffin top now. Work, work, work it off with house cleaning!!!
Happy New Year!
Becky
That's pretty close to home!! lol
I didn't know Mariska Hargitay was Janye Mansfield's daughter!
~M
Post a Comment